Back in the day, they sacrificed human virgins, how did it get switched to goats?
-Satan probably
Because when virgin sacrifices didn’t stop droughts, the Aztec elder said to sacrifice kids. This was misinterpreted to kids as in young goats rather than human children.
What’s even more confusing with this fake history is the Aztec didn’t speak English so none of this makes sense.
low quality virgins
If it were sheep, the Welsh were to blame
Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.
Bro, you just gave me an idea…
How furiously?
“I sent you my goat. Please respond.”
I kinda want the “nice” version where Satan sets up a goat sanctuary staffed by all the “virgins” getting sacrificed as well.
Knowing how obnoxious goats are, this could explain why Satan sends demons to earth. It’s a fair trade.
hey satan i got a good goat shwarma recipe if you need one
Satan is obviously vegan
Hail Seitan!
Satan’s not kidding around
Send in the goats!
And Satan is such a nice figure he keeps and tends the critters. And goats can be extremely annoying. Goofy, stuborn, a bit malicious too. But annoying.
