If you have a problem with the number of people your partner slept with prior to meeting you, you really shouldn’t be dating, as you need therapy to work through your issues before you start mucking about with other people.

I’m 45. I haven’t kept a count of ‘conquests’ since my early 20s. If a woman knows her number without thinking about it, that tells me a lot about her maturity level and matters way more than the actual number.

It smells like reheated puritanism in here… Glad to know the more things change, the more they stay the same.

No, it would not matter to me. I wouldn’t ask, either. People deserve their privacy. But I’m aware of how outdated that concept may sound or be, nowadays. If I got to know, I’d like to know from the start. Because… yes.

The least I’d expect would be for the person to respect me and make sure everything was well and safe, before condoms could be considered to be overlooked. I always made sure to watch my health in regards to others.

I’m aware that for this hypothetical STDs are to be diaregarded but still…

But “body count”? What happened to “sex partners” or “lovers”? Got too clinical or too intimate? I’d like to understand the almost pathological need of lingo nowadays to create distance or sound military. In this case, both at the same time. Let’s dehumanize ourselves a bit more.

Going back to the original question again:

No, it does not matter how many people warmed their sheets or enjoyed their bits. Good for them, got lucky, but I get to keep the prize. Maybe share a bit, if we get a bit more on the wild side.

Let’s raise the stakes. What if the person is/was a sex worker? A prostitute or maybe a porn actor or actress? Does their line of work makes them less worthy of having emotional needs? Less human? Less of a person? Not really. In my understanding they are as deserving, if not even more, of having someone love, respect and support them.

I remember watching this documentary on sex workers years back and how this actress described her need, after a long day of work of being fucked, to go home, have a shower, have a nice meal with her partner and afterwards go to bed and make love in the missionary position. Telling, isn’t it?

And in the extreme scenario of that long line of people stemming from some trauma or perhaps a mental health condition, again, it should not matter at all.

I’m now available for your downvotes and vitriole.

I’m married so it’s moot, but I’m gonna go against the grain a little bit here. I don’t know that it would ever be a dealbreaker but it might signal a fundamental incompatibility because of me. I recently discovered the term “demisexual” and that describes me pretty well. I’d say I’m somewhere between demi and flat out asexual. So yeah, I wouldn’t judge a high number from a partner but I would worry that we wouldn’t work out, if that makes sense.

I know for a fact my wife has a higher count than I do, how much more? No clue, because I never asked and it doesn’t matter.

Everything she’s done up until I met her, made her the woman I love today.

don’t care. I’ve never even asked a woman how many people she’s been with. It’s none of my business.

Not a deal breaker at all :3

Honestly makes it more fun uwu

Body count is stupid.

As long as someone is honest with you, cares about you, and gotten tested so they aren’t spreading anything… who honestly gives a shit?

Not a factor at all, but using the term “body count” is enough on its own to lose interest.

As long as the body count is not murders or abducted people in a basement its fine

Not only do I not mind, I would hope that my perspective partner would have enough sexual experience so that we would both enjoy ourselves.

Anything above 5 makes me cautious. Anything above 10 is a hard no.

And no, this is not a double standard, I am below 5 myself

I have had zero partners, and I think I’d feel really insecure with someone more experienced. Depending on the person it might not be a dealbreaker, as long as it’s not more than maybe 2 or 3. Although I know that is a very small percentage of people my age :(

So “body count” in American English means murders in most contexts. Making this question rather confusing at first.

I can’t answer the first question because my wife and I both have counts of 1: each other. The second question…if I had an issue I would make that clear before a first date of it was indeed a deal breaker.

One homicide might be an accident, once someone’s over a dozen I wouldn’t want them in my house.