If being a corporate hoe taught me anything, it’s that you should NEVER sacrifice your health, including your mental health, for a company.
If you burn out, no colleague is going to care for you. If you fall ill, no boss is going to visit you. If you die, oh, you’ll very much have someone from the company go to your funeral : they need to be sure you’re indeed dead so that they can stop paying your salary.
Gotta make sure you’re buried and dead
If you complete your death transaction without filing out a suicide and/or falling accident permit, you will be posthumously demoted!
Do a flip!
This sounds straight out of Severance
It’s from Futurama
Surprised I didn’t recognize it.
Boss: I know your dad just died, but can you login and submit your September time sheet before noon? Otherwise I have to email HR and ask them for help and they’re honestly so much to have to deal with.
Were you, uh, planning on taking the full day for the funeral or just like a few hours for the service…? No worries, either way, you’ve got to look out for yourself!
If you have to do this, could you at least do it at home? Please? The paperwork is going to be a nightmare. Thanks, my man!
Know why your time sheet is so important? You’ve signed off saying you labored X hours. Without that the state labor board can fuck your employer over.
You don’t need a lawyer to make the call. Government labor agencies are absolute attack dogs who side with the employee claims if the employer can’t produce a signature.
It’s not that i don’t like the concept but it only works if the contract allows you to fill out your timesheet truthfully. Otherwise it is just another bureaucratic burden.
Based agency tbh
Based af
This reminds me of my opinion that we need to find a way to fine dead people who die before they complete contracts they’ve signed. If you agree to work for my company for x amount of years your death shouldn’t allow you to go back on your word.
Make their kids take it up? Obvious solution.
Next kin takes up debts etc. Why not contracts too?
Next of kin don’t take up debts unless they’re co-signatories. The assets of the deceased generally go to the creditors first, yes, nullifying any inheritance the next of kin may have been in line for, but the inheritance doesn’t then run in reverse if those assets aren’t enough to cover the debt.
That won’t stop the creditor from trying any trick in the book to get the next of kin to pay, including lying about it, but I’d like to hear of a jurisdiction where the next of kin are legally liable.
Orzhov vibes
If they jump, how will HR know when to adjust his punch and how to adjust payment and benefits for dying on the clock at the end of the pay period? Best to clock out and submit the timesheet first /s
no time sheet = free labor
He’s starting to believe.
